(Videoblogs) The Importance of Consistency
No commentsBy Marlin Rollins
No matter who we are, or what we do in life, most of us have kids. And there are numerous theories floating around regarding parenting. The two I have found that are crucial above all else: teaching my kids that everything but love, shelter, clothes, schooling and food are privileges, not rights, and more importantly is to be consistent with them.
It is imperative that you are consistent with EVERYTHING starting when the child is very small. Sounds easy, but it’s very hard to do. We all get caught up in our lives, get frustrated or angry and threaten things we don’t mean, are too tired to deal with keeping our word, or don’t have the strength for the temper tantrums and begging. Besides, those little buggers are so darn cute when they plead for something, and have a unique way of melting your heart at the most inopportune times. How do we resist caving in? It’s not easy! But having two boys 13 and 15, I can tell you it only gets worse. Because if you aren’t consistent in the beginning, they learn you will cave, that you don’t follow through and if they wait it out long enough, beg or plead enough, you’ll give in. As an example, I have been telling my oldest for years to raise his grades or he won’t be allowed to get his driving permit. He blew me off, but when he turned 15 1/2 (the driving permit age in California) I refused to let him get it. He was floored. He thought for sure I would cave, but I didn’t. We’ll see if his grades improve now or not.
I have not been very consistent with my boys while they were growing up. I tried, I tried very hard, but I work full time, I have health issues, I had my boys in my thirties, and I’m just plum worn out! They know from past experience if they play me right, I will go ahead and reverse my previous decisions regarding grounding, etc. Add to the fact that I am not home half of the time they are, because I’m working, I am not home to enforce anything. This makes being consistent extremely difficult. But it is do-able. I’ve learned with my youngest I have to go to the extremes. He got in trouble for not doing his homework, so I told him no X-Box privileges till he raised his grades and I didn’t get notes on his report card that say “missing assignments.” In order to keep that restriction, I had to actually take the X-box console to work with me! Sounds extreme, but it was the only way I could enforce my rule. He got very mad at me, but we all need to remember that we are their parents, not their friends. We are here to produce happy, contributing citizens to our communities. I tell my boys all the time “I’m not as worried about your happiness as I am for your safety.” We as parents have to make priorities, and our kids should be our number one priority, not how tired we are or anything else. I just wish I had reminded myself of that more while they were growing up.
My oldest came home with a marijuana pipe with his name on it not too long ago and I found out he was skipping school, too. Of course I got every excuse in the book…”It’s not mine, I made it for a friend and it broke so I have it to fix for him” etc. etc. blah blah blah. So I went and bought a drug test and told him if he did either again I would kick him out of the house. His response was “Fine, I’ll go to Grama’s.” My reply was “Grama was a school teacher. Do you really think she would allow a flunking student, school ditching drug user in her house?” Sounds harsh, but he hasn’t done either since. If I could go back to when they were smaller, I would change the way I raised them and would have MADE the effort to be more consistent, no matter how worn out I was. Because as they get older, so do I, and I find myself more and more tired each year. I am lucky that they turned out to be relatively good kids. They have their good days and bad days, but all in all I am very proud of them.
Read all the parenting books you want, but I can tell you from experience that the major thing to have happy kids that behave well is consistency with boundaries, limits and rules. And the best thing to teach them to respect things is to teach them the difference between privileges and rights. If you follow those words of advice, you will have happy, well behaved children. Let them speak their minds if they need to, but be sure they do it respectfully. I am not one to censor children, but it better be said with respect! Being consistent with them will also help teach them respect for you.
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How is Online Education Different from Traditional Education
By Dorian Ramsey
These days, the internet has grown into a veritable wealth of information for college seekers. Everything from applying for financial aid to taking a course can be accomplished online. Now, a student can even obtain online degrees from one of many schools offering online education as a viable alternative to a traditional classroom education. How different are these two methods of teaching, and do either prove better for the student? There’s an abundance of information regarding online education, and distance education is becoming increasingly popular for students everywhere.
First and foremost, there are some obvious benefits in obtaining online instant degrees. For example, juggling a job, school and a home can be very difficult as far as commuting to the classroom every day. With online education, you eliminate the need to attend classes, and instead access your coursework from an internet website. This presents an obvious benefit to the overworked college student because his commute is basically slashed in half. What’s more, many distance education programs allow students to complete the coursework any time during the day, while still adhering to overall deadlines. This allows for flexibility that a traditional classroom setting can ordinarily not provide.
However, is an online education truly comparable to the type of education a student would receive in an actual classroom? Many professionals in the field say yes, and certainly students seeking online degrees can confirm this response. Not only does online learning provide a stimulating environment for students, but it promotes even interaction among every student because everyone has a say in classroom discussions. What’s more, online education programs allow each student to learn with the methods that work best for them. Plus, many employers respect online degrees as much as a traditional college degree, so there’s really no difference in the amount of education or respect a student will receive when attending an online college.
While traditional colleges will never be eliminated, there’s definitely been an increase in the amount of students attending online colleges in recent years. Many people choose to follow the online education route for the diversity of material they can find, or because the teachers are more approachable via the internet than they would be in a classroom setting. Students definitely need discipline and self-motivation to succeed in obtaining online degrees, but there’s still the same level of help and support from teachers and students online that there would be in a classroom. What’s more, internet college students are learning skills that will be beneficial to them in the workforce and beyond because of the way technology is evolving today.
Online degrees are becoming an increasingly popular way to obtain a college education and many students are turning to online education because of the quality of material, convenience and the level of flexibility inherent in distance education programs. Because there’s no distinct differences between an online education and a traditional education, students are assured they are receiving the same kind of education that they would in a brick and mortar setting. There are definite benefits to online degree programs, and students with discipline and motivation can and will succeed greatly in online education programs.
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Easing the Pain of Child Birth
By Marlin Rollins
Child birth is one of the most natural events in a women’s life yet it strikes fear in many of our hearts and voices. There is so much knowledge on child birth and child care how do we know we are doing the right thing. The countless books, and advice can make any women’s head swirl, and it is important for the mom - to - be to remember is isn’t as complicated as it sounds.
It’s simple - child birth is a natural and beautiful gift given to women in order to conceive precious lives full of wonder. It is a wondrous event which should be cherished and remembered. Once your baby is born you will look into her eyes with fond delight, and see a new beginning for your life, and family.
In order to prepare for that future you should ask yourself if you are ready for your first child birth experience. The room is ready, the clothes are bought, and the toys are well stocked right up until she turns the age of three. Your due date is getting closer, your back is getting sorer, and you can feel the baby kicking more, and you are counting the fingers on your hand until your delight is born.
The only internal fear you maybe facing is the actual child birth itself, and there are several ways to prepare yourself for the unknown. Before giving birth ensure you pack a hospital bag ahead of schedule; including your basic necessities. But, also don’t forget the luxuries which will make your birth more enlightening, and comfortable. Here are six essential items which will make your child birth painless:
Make sure you pack a comfortable night gown to ensue optimum freedom for you to move and get comfortable during your labor.
Soothing music will take your focus away from the pain.
Massage oil is a wonderful tool in assisting in alleviating the pain and will make your partner play an important role during the birthing hours.
A harlequin romance novel nothing a little bit more savory to keep your mind concentrated on anything but child birth.
Last but not least snacks, lots of good snacks to help you and your partner get through the longs hours of labor.
Champagne it will be time to celebrate once the new bundle of joy arrives and what’s better than a great toast with lots of bubbly.
A few but needful necessities will help create a better atmosphere your birthing room, making you feel at ease, as you bring in a new breath of life into your world. It is an exciting time, and should be one filled with rest, comfort, and joy - on the arrival day make sure you look into your babies precious eyes and savor every minute of life.
“Speak tenderly to them. Let there be kindness in your face, in your eyes, in your smile, in the warmth of our greeting. Always have a cheerful smile. Don’t only give your care, but give your heart as well.” This is powerful advice from Mother Teresa and is relevant to anyone who is to have their first baby.
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Thursday, December 31st, 2009 at 9:15 pm and is filed under education. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
